Anybody who thinks being a film fan is easy, clearly doesn’t understand some of the painful experiences we have to endure over the year. This year has been another great one for film, with plenty of brilliant and varied films gracing our screens. However, there have been some right stinkers as well.
Here is my list of the ten films I’ve hated the most this year, which you should watch at your own peril. You’ve been warned…
Due to a limited release at cinemas, I had to wait ages until I finally saw Kumiko the Treasure Hunter – a film I was genuinely looking forward to watching. Perhaps it was the high levels of anticipation that ended up ruining it for me.
Its concept, which tells the story of a young woman who goes in search of the large case of money buried in the Coen brothers’ Fargo – believing the film to be real – is one that sounded full of quirk and intrigue. The film ended up having neither of these things.
In truth, Kumiko the Treasure Hunter has very little of anything going for it. Other than some okay performances, it is a dull as dishwater telling of what could have been a remarkable story.
9 – Lost River
Ryan Gosling’s directorial debut is easily one of 2015’s strangest movies – and not in a good way.
Twisted fantasy and documentary-like realism don’t sit well together, and so much time is spent trying to replicate the style of filmmakers such as regular collaborator Nicolas Winding Refn, that it’s hard to distinguish any distinctive style from Gosling himself.
It is a weird and ultimately dull first effort from an otherwise brilliant actor.
I was always expecting Seventh Son to be utter rubbish, but in a fun kind of way. Well, at least I was half right.
The usually fantastic Jeff Bridges inaudibly mumbles his way through the movie, in what is probably an attempt to disguise some of the worst dialogue he has ever had to perform.
Not even Julianne Moore – who won an Oscar this year, by the way – can save the film from its poor dialogue and less than lacklustre ‘action sequences’.
7 – Strange Magic
In a year of otherwise outstanding animation, Strange Magic stands out as the very worst we’ve had this year. With a story from George Lucas – the man who created Star Wars for goodness sakes – I’d have expected more from this.
The film is a complete mess, with far too many characters and an overly complicated plot which steals riffs from the much better Frozen. Compared to the likes of Inside Out and The Tale of the Princess Kaguya, this simply wasn’t good enough.
6 – Survivor
A thriller with zero thrills, Survivor is perhaps one of the most boring movies of the year. It tried and failed to replicate the success of television series’ such as 24 and Spooks, with even the inclusion of James Bond himself (Pierce Brosnan) failing to add any kind of excitement.
Not only was it scaremongering drivel, it was filled with stereotypes and clichés from minute one. Oddly pretentious, it’s bottom shelf rental fodder at the very best, whose appearance in the cinema was an insult to audiences everywhere.
5 – The Visit
There was hope for a minute there that M. Night Shymalan’s latest was a return to form. With many claiming to love it and many claiming to hate it, The Visit was easily one of this year’s most divisive movies. As you may have guessed already, I fell into the latter camp.
I hated this film with a passion, so much so that may scathing review even made it onto Kermode and Mayo’s Film Review – which I have to admit was a proud moment for me.
The film’s biggest problem is the use of the already outdated ‘found footage’ format, which only serves to draw attention away from what is a fairly decent concept. The characters are beyond irratating, the twist can be spotted a mile off and the scary moments are ruined by shit humour – literally.
4 – Taken 3
Who knew that when Taken was released back in 2008, that it would come to this?
The least ‘Taken’ film of the series, this final instalment in the trilogy lacks the punch of its original. Hindered by a 12a certificate, the hard hitting violence is gone and any bad language is not so subtly re-dubbed over in the edit.
Liam Neeson sleepwalks through what is a contrived and dire script, which sees him on the run when he’s framed for a murder he didn’t commit. He survives car crashes with mere scratches and fights a gangster who is dressed in nothing but tightey whities. Enough said.
3 – Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2
There are some movies which simply should not exist – Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 is one of these movies. After the first Paul Blart proved to be so popular – apparently – he’s back a second time around to fight some art thieves, and a giant bird, in Las Vegas.
My distinct memory of this film is a full Saturday audience sat in silence, except for the constant crying of a young child. At least I think it was a child. This was such a a painful watch, I could have probably broken down crying as well.
It’s dumb, unfunny garbage that features one of the most irritating ‘actors’ working today, Kevin James. Speaking of which…
2 – Pixels
Yes, Kevin James makes another unwelcome appearance in my list, with Pixels; this time playing the President of the United States – which to be fair, is the only laugh that’s to be had in the film.
However, this time he’s joined by his good mate and regular collaborator, Adam Sandler, who together ruin what might have been a fairly decent movie.
The concept is pretty solid, but what was supposed to be Wreck-It Ralph meets Ghostbusters, ended up being a mess of stupid jokes, rubbish action sequences and dodgy female representations. Chris Coloumbus should be ashamed of himself.
1 – Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension
I really, really hated what’s supposed to be the final instalment of the Paranormal Activity series. I say ‘supposed to be’ as from the film’s open-ending, I naturally assumed there was going to be yet another sequel.
The open-ended nature is partly why I hated it so much. Up until this point, the franchise has been a miserable and pessimistic series of movies, so I was hoping we’d at least get some closure here and that the characters would actually start to win against the ghost-demons.
I was wrong. The Ghost Dimension continues the trend of depressing and bizzare endings which lack any kind of real writing at all. All the while, it rips off Tobe Hooper’s classic Poltergeist, has plot holes aplenty and features some of the most abysmal dialogue to ever grace a cinema screen.
If this is indeed the final Paranormal Activity film, then good riddance.
So, those are the films I hated most in 2015. Which did you hate? What have I missed out? Feel free to leave a comment below.